Today is such a special day. But it's incomplete without him around. When I thought of that, it makes me feel that the day is so gloomy, so meaningless. I just didn't want to do anything but just close myself in the room, shut myself from the world and sleep through the day.

But I can't. I have work which I totally have no mood for.

First day back in company to do admin and paper work, occasionally some production work. Back to office and I have mixed feelings. Everyone's obviously still talking about him since I'm his girlfriend. Worse thing, I'm supposed to be his temporary replacement and when I sat at his desk, everything just kicks in; all the memories, his writings, his coins, his bottle and even his hair. How could I carry on with work... Anyway, back to when I first stepped into the office; I saw the white board which he wrote beside his name - 'Gone to be a soldier.' And I just feel like crying. Miss him so fucking much.

The day passed on really slowly. Every now and then he will appear in my thoughts. And I will have the urge to just head on home. Anyway I was supposed to meet Lynnda and the girls at night for dinner. But I was delayed at work. Imagine that my knock off time is at 6 p.m. and the meeting time is at 6.30 p.m. but I was still doing my work at 7.30 p.m. By then I really didn't have the mood for dinner and to meet them too. I don't want to show them my sad, dumb ass face. I told Lynnda that I want to just go home and waste the rest of my day away. I simply have no mood and I felt even worse when I have the thinking that today I was supposed to be spending the time with someone else important. But she insisted that I should come and join them. So I joined them after I ended work around 8.30 p.m. and boss sent me to Bugis.

Met them at the steamboat place. Tried to eat something. But seriously my mind is at somewhere else, Pulau Tekong I guess. Finally, he called! Talked for awhile. And our line was cut off quite a few times but he called all the way till lights out. I was really glad he called. Those calls meant the world to me. After we hanged up, he even sent me a message. It was one the sweetest message. But that also made me miss him even more.













Today is our six years anniversary.